A Phrase That Can Change Your Life: Shut the Love Up

Shut the love up. ⁣

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Isn’t that great? ⁣

When I moved out to the wilds of the mountain west I met an older cowboy gentleman, who just happened to be out dancing most Tuesday nights when I was, and over the weeks we chatted a whole lot. ⁣

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One night he told me that his favorite four-letter word is love. He uses it just like anyone uses the F, S, or D word..or hell for that matter. He believed that you’ve either got love or nothing. So why not tell people to use it in every instance, even the frustrating ones? ⁣

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I remember thinking to myself while in this conversation “Save this one, you’ll need it.” ⁣

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Little did I know that I’d need it right here and now in my journey as a life and relationship coach. ⁣

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Today I spent frustrated, I’ve been up and down and all around. I’ve been feeling locked up in my 9-5 gig, uninspired with how to access you all (truly, hello vulnerability - didn’t I promise to see more of you?). Negative, predatory thoughts have been running through my head all day. Preying on the high-vibe headspace I try to get in every morning. ⁣

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“Why should I...” “Where do I get off thinking…” “What’s all this for anyway?” ⁣

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And then I said to myself “Would you shut the love up!?” Do it, just shut the ever-present, love up. ⁣

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With that I breathed a sigh of relief, knowing this is for you. ⁣

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I’m in the realness now, I’m seeing relationships form and shift, drop and grow. I’m remembering and having dreams of situations long past. ⁣

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These are the things that I have been brought here to share with you. ⁣

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Today the biggest thing is - shut the love up. Just do it. ⁣

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I want you to take whatever negative thoughts you’ve had haunting you lately, say “Ok, thanks for making that point. I’m going away now, and you are too.” ⁣

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Go dive into something you love. I’m not just talking about whatever Goop is recommending this month I mean go take care of yourself. For me, honestly if you want to know what my self-care is going to look like after this post, it’s going to look like this: ⁣

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Finish the half-eaten bag of dill pickle potato chips I impulse bought on the way home out of frustration, and plop down in front of the TV. Once there, I’m going to put on a video game...yup a video game. ⁣

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I’m going to get lost in something that is totally separate from my daily life, the last time I picked up the controller was in May. This is one of those self-care pieces that rarely sees the light of day due to the guilt I feel around it. But I love it, I’m going to enjoy playing a game that is set in the wilds of the American West and enjoy the absolutely love out of it. ⁣

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Then, I’m going to enjoy a quiet evening. Maybe I’ll pick up a book, maybe I’ll just sit on the couch with my partner and veg out. Maybe I’ll take a shower and throw on some essential oils, maybe I’ll meditate...Mostly, I’m going to do whatever the love I want to do at that moment. ⁣

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That’s self-care folks, that’s what we need in our lives, especially when they’re running as fast as a high-speed train that feels like it may or may not be derailing. ⁣

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I want to hear what you do to truly care for yourself. Tell me the healthy stuff and tell me the “I’m kinda ashamed this is self-care” stuff. The truth is, if it works for you then it's self-care. ⁣

The only rule is moderation and making sure you don’t get stuck doing it day in and day out to numb yourself. ⁣

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Allow yourself the bag of weird flavored potato chips now and then, allow yourself to stare at a screen longer than you feel you should. Allow yourself to let your guard down. ⁣

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Be vulnerable, be real and most of all, care for yourself. There’s only one of you, after all. ⁣

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Now go shut the love up and love yourself. ⁣